Living a Vision of Healing- Decolonizing Accountability and Acts of Forgiveness (Creating Practices for Rebuilding w/ Those in Our Communities that Have Harmed Us)

Living a Vision of Healing- Decolonizing Accountability and Acts of Forgiveness

(Creating Practices for Rebuilding w/ Those in Our Communities that Have Harmed Us)

 

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What does it take to heal, especially when the hurt and trauma come from within your community? People of Color communities have been facing very visible and very real humanizing revelations of our idols- that have been harmful to communal identities and social justice movements. Particularly we have seen the ills of White Supremacy and Patriarchy arise in relation to Cis Men of color who have been influencers of justice and liberation in our communities, speaking and acting in ways that diminish our ability to feel we can hold them to their past actions and word that have served community awareness and uprising (Kanye, Fabulous, Nas, Bill Cosby, Junto… and this is just some of the most recent defaming. The list goes on.)  In reality, these men are protected by a society that upholds justification for these actions, imbedded in their own trauma from oppressive structures. A long list of excuses as to why they were lead to living out these offenses are brought to light- though validity is present in these moments of empathy and compassion, it should never discount the harm and damage they cause. The real deal, is if they decided to be on the defense, or denial tip for their actions, these men I listed, like many men of celebrity before them, could go on and continue with their lives- protected and supported by Patriarchy and Capitalism, and still glorified by many.

 

Should the response, as it has been so prevalently made by our communities, to “dead” our idols? To disown them and discount who they may have stood for to us before the moment in which they have harmed and offended us.  Is there no coming back from these harmful words and action? Is there no possible means of reconciliation? I ask these questions, not just in reflection to celebrities of influence, but I ask them in connection to those within our closest circles of relations that influence and inspire us, when they say, act or create in a ways that disrupts relation, offending, harming, disrupting and destroying bonds that have been built, particularly in the walk toward building Love and Liberation.

 

I’ve been sitting deeply in listening to the questions arising in my heart about how the journey of accountability in our communities asks us to move beyond the very real reactionary feelings of anger, disappointment and mourning from the pain, the damage and the destruction. This moment asks us to move beyond these feelings that often make us cut off, remove people form our lives. I ask us to vision how those who have insulted and injured us can be held to enact daily practices and actions that are in the “Vision of Healing”. I think on how because of the complexities of trauma in this world, that it is a common practice to rather than work on restoration and reconciliation, that we sever and erase. Often we do this to avoid further hurt and deeper creation of injury and often it is because of fear, of further hurt and harm. We cannot believe that after someone inflicts pain and offense on us, that they would be willing or able to heal what has been destroyed. And because of the constructs of this world, often they do not. Partly because of their unknowing of how to, or because the ills of this world have made them really feel they have not wronged us.

 

The complexities of the work of accountability go beyond just “calling someone out” and disowning and disregarding them – it becomes much more difficult to “invite them in” to a vision of betterment and rebuilding that asks us all to shift and see each other underneath the constructions that make us forget our responsibility to one another. We must see how much we are responsible for the maintaining of suffering and oppressive cycles, when we do not see beyond our pain and trauma. If we cannot as a whole community make room for these difficult healing processes to be created, we abandon hope, we maintain the rupture, that breeds in us distrust and fear and that relieves us of examining what it is that we communally have not worked to heal, so we can as individuals in times of human error and injury, see the ability and need to heal.  It is time to create Visions of Healing, that we can live out. It is our responsibility to become clearer about what it will take to restore and reconcile what has been broken in our relations to each other.

I believe that we are being given an opportunity with the visibility of communal harm and hurt from idolized figures of celebrity, to begin processes of creating protocol for accountability and for healing these egregious acts. And we must live out that healing, with sound discernment of what accountability looks like as practice beyond just statements of regret and promises to make things right. Or one action that will create a bandage, that seeks forgiveness, though the hurt and harm need much deeper healing. What does it look like to reconcile? How do we make room for the healing needed not only for the relations who have been harmed, but also for the individuals that have caused harm?  How can they take responsibility in a way that their Living becomes continuous acts of healing for self and community? For any given situation where we have felt a loss of faith in someone, where we have felt reprehensible damage has been done- what will it take to heal?

In moments in my own life when I have felt the actions of others have been harmful toward me, I practice for myself a level of demand that the harm is known, and that also with compassion and the want to heal that we look at where it was rooted. The invitation to move toward sustained and deepened accountability through a Vision of Healing, asks us to see one another in ways that may not have been possible before the offense. In these moments we are being asked to look at our most insidious traumas, the parts of ourselves that if confronted would change parts of ourselves that we never knew were limiting us, and holding us hostage to behaviors of oppression toward self and other.

 

It is important to understand that when we are harmed and hurt by others, we become victim, not just to the individual who has spoken the words, or done the actions that have harmed and hurt, but also by all the societal and human created influences that are rooted in oppression and injustice subconsciously supporting these damaging moments to occur. Capitalism, Patriarchy and White Supremacy are the main agents of Colonization that influence so many of the actions that harm and hurt self and others. To be in a position of understanding how we are all moved by these constructions of oppression, especially at the core of any moment and dynamic of harm and hurt that is lived, is crucial to the possibility of healing. When the harm and hurt occur, we are being confronted with much more than a moment of offense from a single person- we are being confronted with a lifetime, and often ancestrally inherited, traumas that propel and fuel an ability to hurt and harm, even those we cherish and Love most in this world.

 

I have been formulating protocols for myself as to how to hold community and self-accountable to moments of offense and invite a collaborative understanding of creating Visions of Healing together and root those visions in clear lived actions and practices that will sustain a path toward healing and liberation for all those effected.  For now they have remained quite simple, and it is the actual continuity of practice that is where the complexities lie:

 

1) Speak- on the immediate reaction to the harm and hurt. Honor your feelings that come instantly, but do not these reactions be what leads your process of addressing the harm and hurt.

2) Learn- Be in active and communal examination of where the harm and hurt are rooted for you- personally/relationally/societally. There is no timeline to this, it may take your whole life to understand where it all comes from- or you may never fully understand in this lifetime.

3) See Each Other- Recognize dynamics and create exchange for understanding of all perspectives connected to the hurt and harm. Let yourself become aware and in relation to all that contributes to the ability for the hurt and harm to take place and exist.

4) Vision the Healing- Ask “What does it look like to heal this?”- understanding that there is never a quick fix to any hurt or harm. Be conscious about what it means to be in “continuous healing”- center all means of healing with continued action and practice.

5) Live in your Vision of HealingKnow that healing is a lifelong journey- that moments of hurt and harm stay with you and so it takes constant addressing and confronting when that hurt and harm show up to live beyond these moments in a good way. Root yourself in daily actions and practices that you mean to grow into your behaviors and ways of being, that uplift, empower and Love beyond just the reconciling of the hurt and harm, but that seeks to ground you in the ability to be held and hold others accountable for the liberation of us all.

 

The specifics of this process will vary from moment to moment, but it is a starting foundation that I have begun to implement in my daily life. Continuously asking myself- and now asking of you all “How do you create your Vision of Healing? Your Vision of Communal and Individual Liberation? And live in it, inviting all others to join you?”

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Accountability of Self and Other- In the Acts of Recognizing Our Living Ancestry

Accountability of Self and Other- In the Acts of Recognizing Our Living Ancestry

I write this in reflection of an unfolding of an exchange that I know will resonate very deeply for creators in this present day existence. My question posed to us is how can be allow our send of empowerment and agency to be directly in relation to our ability to be accountable to ourselves and each other. This is a sign that I have recently posted in my classroom:

 

AGENCY + ACCOUNTABILITY = LIBERATION

 

And I placed it there to directly address a lot of what is surfacing in the world, that begs us to be responsible for what we express, act upon and create in the world and also to hold our communities responsible to each other for what they express, act upon and create in the world. There are many people who have a very strong sense of agency in this existence, but to have agency and lack the accountability to be aware and responsible for how it affects others is the problem that we are coming up against, especially with the intense visibility that this age of Social Media brings. It is the difference between Kanye, and Chance where one in his greater visibility and entrenched in his ego has lost site of how his words and actions are directly related to the survival and the living of his own community- and another who mis-stepped in the want to support his brother and in being held accountable by his community readily addressed with humility an expression of apology and the intention to right it by his actions. Read the apology here: CHANCE THE RAPPER ISSUES APOLOGY AFTER DEFENDING KANYE WEST’S SUPPORT OF DONALD TRUMP

I have been teaching my students the importance of awareness, and the responsibility we have to ourselves, our words and our actions.

 

Yesterday the presence of a quotation from one of my artistic works was brought into visibility after it was photographed from a workshop that I conducted at the Women of Color in Solidarity Conference that stated:

 

“The Act of Decolonizing

Is an Act of Re-membering

How to Love Yourself”

 

This is an uncovering that has taken my entire lived path of returning to my ancestors, to find grounding in. It is a recognition of the real work that it has, and continues to take, in order to look myself in the mirror and walk in this world knowing my ancestors are within me and made up in my physical being. Decolonization work is sacred because it peels away the layers of oppressive, constructed and conditioned knowings of self and replaces it with a liberation that sees us as holistically Divine. I share this process as an artist, activist and a healer who has been greatly understanding the importance of expressing outwardly in the world, as a representation of my Ancestors and as a living guide for my Descendants.

 

This quotation was directly cut from the photograph posted on the Women of Color in Solidarity posting and repurposed for a meme on a very visible page run by sisters who are doing decolonizing work in tandem. One of the participants of the workshop and a sister in this walk messaged me with the recognition that this was done without the act of acknowledging source.  I visited the page (which I do not name, because the point is to see this moment as a teaching moment, and not as a means to be in conflict with the sisters who run the page itself, though I know that it may cause them discomfort and challenge for growth and self inquiry) with an invitation in the comment section to please cite my name with the photo saying something I the line of:

 

“Peace Sisters, these words are my echoes of my Ancestors. My name is –Jana Lynne Umipig, please cite my name in honoring.”

 

Directly placing my name in relation to the words that were channeled through my expression of uncovered understanding of the world.  What came after was the erasure of my comment and a citing of my handle on the post caption. What was lacking here was the full understand of what it means for women, like myself who are creators and may not be as visible in Social Media platforms, to be honored for their words and creations. It is so easy to cut, copy and paste what is shared and not give credit, acknowledgement and honoring to where it was rooted. And when we do not do the work to honor, it becomes a part of our subconscious adoption of colonial practices of erasure. I DM’ed the sisters with an invitation into a conversation around accountability the following is that exchange:

 

JL: Peace family. I am inviting you in exchange in this moment. Please take a moment to reflect on the erasure that has just taken place on your page. I directly commented with the ask that you cite my words, my ancestral channeled expression. In honoring, please take down your post with the editing to include my name. And please acknowledge what has been done here. This is an invitation to examine how we honor each other in sacred work of re-membering.

NO RESPONSE FROM SISTERS WHO POSTED THE MEME

JL: This is quite heart breaking as I have shared and uplifted your page many times. Please be in prayer around the act of erasure that has taken place here. Not only of my name on connection to my words, but then of my ask to you in the comments- directly erasing my name- my handle is not my name dear sisters- please honor this.
SISTERS WHO POSTED THE MEME: I don’t understand. I did exactly as you asked and even tagged you, in the image. I didn’t mean to disrespect. I found this image on Pintrest with no credit to anyone. Thank you for your words and check.
JL: Word, sister. Thank you for getting back, I know this may be a moment of spirits really needing to be in listening. I understand your feeling moved by the quotation. And though not meaning to disrespect, I invite you to have a real moment to reflect on protocol. How do we as a community look to uplift the names of Womxn whose words are of ancestral channeling? What do we do to seek the honoring of each other. To even ask where the words may have surfaced from before posting?

 

I mean to ask you to edit your photo to include my name-otherwise the image may just end up on Pintrest again or any other platform without acknowledgement. 

 

I have been praying deeply about the ways we honor ourselves in the demanding of our names to be connected to all we release, express and create in this world. As a means for our descendants to find us.

Please also send me the Pintrest link so I can follow up with that community.

 

What commenced after this was no more response. And as other sisters were raising voice of solidarity and acknowledgment both in my inbox and the comment thread of that post, the sisters removed the commenting ability and proceeded to erase the entire post.

What this became was a direct response to an invitation of accountability, which was very visible to, at the least, my sisterhood and communal family circles. The response was one of erasure, without accountability and a humbling that allows us to move with healing and uplifting intention. More than ever I am recognizing the importance of engraving, etching, binding our names to our work. And to ask of that honoring from our community is crucial, because there are so many, as reflective of historical colonial tactics, that will see that the naming of ourselves is powerful and choose to discount us, to not name us, to readily claim works and creations as their own, or often call it anonymous because they’d rather not do the work to understand and be in knowing of their origin.

 

Ijeoma Umebinyuo @ijeomaumebinyuo tweeted this truth in connection to this stating “Generations of women whose works were stolen, displayed in your museums with no name and you think I’m creating to be anonymous?”

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I have grown through moments when my community has held me accountable, to any moments of misrepresentation of quoting or depiction through an image or video post. I have allowed myself to be humble to the reality of being so moved by something and it being so easy to just post and re-post without intentional regard. I understand this, and when we are called out it is important for us to check the shame and guilt, the defensiveness that arises from being asked to reflect and often retract and edit our words, actions and creations when it represents others.

The invitation for all of us in our interactions and postings on the internet and social media is to name yourself in your work, be very clear about what protocols you have around how people share your words, expressions and creations. Keeping in mind the value of how Agency + Accountability = Liberation. I hold myself to and I hold our communities to this as well. If we are to work in tandem- in solidarity- on this journey of connecting the ancestral to the future we have to be willing to understand how we are setting our descendants up to know us, to re-member who we are. And so much of what is archived of our lives has become very public through Social Media, which begs us to be very conscious and intentional about the way we hold ourselves and ask others to hold us in our expressions. Let your names be boldly written in all your reflections family. Teach others how to honor your name, your image, and your creations as they show up in sharing and relational exchange with others. Teach them to care for your self-preservation, for you, for your ancestors and your descendants. And practice the same in return.

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ReVisioning- Utilizing Our Most Revolutionary Tool in the Resistance

ReVisioning- Utilizing Our Most Revolutionary Tool in the Resistance

Curricula compiled and Conceptualized by Jana Lynne “JL” Umipig (www.janalynnecreativeproductions.com)

Full Curricula as a Doc. File and Supplementary Hand Outs Found Here: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/0B9CDbYZlCoGZSWtTRnJfQ2pmV2M?usp=sharing


INTRODUCTIONS and CHECK-IN: Who are you, Introduce Yourself and your Personal Pronouns and what is something that you want to call into the space to energize and uplift our gathering today?

Tool for Entire Workshop: ONGOING KNOWLEDGE COLLECTION: Have participants take out a piece of paper and let it be their place they can take notes and in particular have them write down questions that come up for them throughout the day that they want answered. This will be an invitation for them to find the answers, from each other beyond the space cultivated, or for

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ACTIVITY #1 OPENING: RELEASE, RE-MEMBER, RECLAIM

Materials Needed Physical Capacities (**Check-in and let folks know to do as much as they are physically able, and create adjustments for those with physical disabilities to adjust to the movements asked in this exercise), open minds, and open hearts
Space Preparation Make sure that they have their hands and bodies free and that they have space to move around them.

 

This is a condensed version from the exercise of Release- in the curriculum “Release, Re-Member, Reclaim–Healing the Activist (Curriculum for Holding and Uplifting Leaders in All Communities)” (Insert Link: https://kayumanggingapilipina.com/2016/11/12/release-re-member-reclaim-healing-the-activist-curriculum-for-holding-and-uplifting-leaders-in-all-communities/ )

(*If you have a mixed class with Trump Supporters, do the Awareness exercise first and then you can use this tool for reflection)

 

STEP 1: You can do this in exchange in many ways- the two options that I want to offer are

  1. This is a good choice for groups that know one another very well: Make two concentric circles, an inner circle and an outer circle. Where there are pairings of two, one person in the inner and another in the outer. Have them face one another. For each question you will rotate the inner or outer circle so that they are facing a new partner for each question.
  2. This is a good choice for groups that are new to knowing one another or mixed- it allows them the opportunity to leave with at least one person who they connected with deeply: Pair up, you will be building with one

 

STEP 2: Each question will have an action in place with it, these actions naturally support release. Use them to help your soul be supported with release of your words.

Questions to ask:

  1. ACTION: Shake your hands, arms, feet, legs out as you speak there as if you are shaking these things off your body

QUESTION: Release any feelings and thoughts you have regarding the days that have passed in connection to the inauguration of D. Trump.

  1. ACTION: Jump up and down, as if you are putting your words down into the earth with each landing.

QUESTION: What issue do you feel is affecting you most personally in relation to the human rights violations Trump has set up?

  1. ACTION: Use the motion of wiping off of skin downward to the ground, imagine that you are taking it off your body, your spirit

QUESTION: What is a hard conversation you have had to have, or one that got you really emotional?

  1. ACTION: As you listen put your hand on your partner’s shoulder

QUESTION: What are the things you have done in the past week in response? What have you done for yourself and for your communities (your family, your friends, your children, etc)?

  1. ACTION: Hold the hand of your partner.

QUESTION: What is something you read or heard or witnessed in connection to the Presidency that you feel has troubled you most?

  1. ACTION: Sit with your partner and hold their hand

QUESTION: What is something you read or heard or witnessed that has given you hope?

 

  1. ACTION: Stand together and hold both hands

QUESTION: What is your most important


SEE: BEGIN WITH AWARENESS

To being ReVisioning, we have to start with being aware, to understand how the visions of others may not serve our own. We have to understand what roots policies being in place. Many of the policies that the Trump Administration are administering are rooted in ideals that are divisive, hateful, charged with fear, ideas of White Supremacy and Patriarchy, false notions of patriotism that insight violence, and are centered around Capitalism and Corporate gain. Really seeing this laid out helps us to know what we are up against- and allows us to work in a way of not just Resistance and Reaction, but also invites us to Vision. 

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ACTIVITY #2- THE POWER OF KNOWING: KNOWLEDGE AS A LIBERATION TOOL

Materials Needed ·      “Community Issues Resistance Knowledge Poster” Hand-Outs (THIS WILL BE A RUNNING DOCUMENT THAT WILL BE EDITED PERIODICALLY IN CONNECTION TO THE RESIST MANUAL)

·      “How Trump’s Platforms Have Direct Effect on Me” Hand- Out

Space Preparation Hang up the posters, or chart them on larger posters around the room

These are ongoing tools of awareness, you can put up a version of this in your school, community center, your home, on your computer desktop, allow it to give you reason to not be complacent to this administration and why action is necessary.

STEP 1- Community Issues Resistance Knowledge:  Have the group take time to look over the posters on the walls or on the floor in the room. Tell them it is important for them to think on what it is striking them, what did they know, what did they not understand?

***You can also print these out and give them to your participants to take home with them.

For each Community Issue, there will be the following- look to attached Google Doc “Community Issues Resistance Knowledge Poster” documents for the created on-going visual documents for this exercise/tool (Insert Link)

If you want to rework this tool, these are what will be included in the document:

  • Community Issue
  • Policies That Have Been Passed and When (* = passed by executive order)
  • Who it Affects
  • Resources for Resistance and Action, What They Have

3 Daily Actions

For all of these issues there are will be 3 things you can do with ease:

  • Call- Numbers will be listed with any script available for calls to be made – otherwise look for numbers of Congress persons in your location.
  • Conversation- These are topics you can bring up to speak on in connection to this issue
  • Post – these are hashtags and groups/ individuals to follow

Community Issues that will be addressed are as follows (Key Resource: Resistance Manua- https://www.resistancemanual.org/Resistance_Manual_Homel )

*Already Addressed by Executive Orders                 *Pending

Health and Human Services Policing
Immigration Voting Rights
Muslim Ban / Registry Tax Cuts for the Wealthy
Climate / Environment LGBTQ Equality
Foreign Policy / Global Security Consumer Protections / Worker’s Rights
Women’s Rights Disability Rights
Educational Justice Mass Incarceration
Housing and Infrastructure

CONNECT: VIOLATION OF RIGHTS FOR SOME, IS THE VIOLATION OF RIGHTS FOR ALL

This part of the curricula is all about seeing ourselves in connection to these violations in a deeper way how does this relate to our everyday, how do they effect the closest people in our lives? How does this effect the progress that has been made by our his/herstory and the ancestors and what they have faced, that are we continuing to face? How does this effect our children in the future, the generations to come?

STEP 1-  How Trump’s Platforms Have Direct Effect On Me:

Pass out the “How Trump’s Platforms Have Direct Effect On Me” Hand-Outs

Have Participants look to their lives in reflection and choose 3 of these issues around the room.

(*Choose 2 that affect you most directly and 1 that you can make a connection to in the scope of your community, and your greater humanity)

This is a reflection sheet, to allow of us to see and analyze how these policies affect us. Take the opportunity to really understand the policies on the way that they affect you personally here, but also reflect deeply on how they affect us all on a larger scale. Remember: “Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.”- Martin Luther King Jr.

Questions Posed on the Worksheets-

BODY

How do these policies affect your everyday life and your abilities to do, say, and live how you always have? What of your freedoms are being validated?

MIND and SPIRIT

How do these policies affect your mentality? What kinds of worries and fears do you have around these?

COMMUNITY

How do these policies affect others in your life? Why does it matter to you that they are being effected?

ReVISION

If you could counter these policies what would you advocate for?


STEP 2 Small Group Reflection:
Split into small groups of 3-5 depending on how many participants there are and share how you have connected your lives to the knowledge of violations being implemented by the Trump Administration. Allow for conversation to deepen.

STEP 3 Whole Group: Bring the group back together to share and create dialogue of what came up in their groups, look for the most crucial connections that have been made thus far.


REVISIONING: CREATE YOUR LIFE INTO EXISTENCE

This is where we begin to work together in a way that is not just about how to counter the Trump Administration’s work. Now we move in a direction of understanding what we have, what makes us powerful, what makes our communities powerful and we are going to map this out for ourselves so we can see and make tangible the power that is our existence.

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ACTIVITY #3- EmPowerment Mapping

Materials Needed ·      “EmPowerment Mapping” Guide- Printed Out as a Handout AND Put it Up on a Large Sheet

·      Large Paper for Each Participant

·      Markers/Pencils/Crayons

·      Optional: Collaging Materials- For More Artistic Expressions

Space Preparation ·      Open Space

·      Tables Can be Set Up

·      Create a Creatively Stimulating Playlist

·      Put Materials Out for Accessibility

 

This exercise is all about creating connections. And is a creative exercise as well. There will be an “EmPowerment Mapping” Guide- Printed Out as a Handout and Put up on a Large Sheet for reference. This guide is just that, a guide, and you can arrange this content the way that makes most sense to you, something you would want to put up in your home, your workspace. If you want to categorize folks and make a list, do that- if you want to arrange the names of people in your life around you and make symbols that represent what they provide for you like on this guide- do that! Be free with your expression.

 

THE PEOPLE THAT EMPOWER YOU IN YOUR LIFE:

  • MENTAL EMPOWERMENT- These are the people who have or who continue to contribute to our Knowing and affirm our Values and Ideas that we have formulated about the world? Who are the teachers in our lives? Who are the people who we feel give to our ability to Know? Who are those that challenge and expand our Knowing?
  • SPIRITUAL EMPOWERMENT – These are those that create Exchange in our Passion Areas, that ground us and uplift us. These are the people that believe in who we are and that we have power within us to do. These are the people we grow with, whose betterment and liberation are bound with ours. Who are the collaborators in our lives? Who are the people who show up and who root for you? Who are the people who encourage you to do what makes you happy in the world?
  • PHYSICAL EMPOWERMENT – These are the people that take care of you. These are the individuals who keep you well in a sense of healthy living. These are the people who understand that when you are in optimal health, then you can serve better and deeper. Who are the people who care about your health? Who are the people you can go to have a good meal- that feed you? Who are the people that provide space for you to rest, to take pause, to reflect and recharge? Who are the people you exercise and train with?
  • JUSTICE EMPOWERMENT – These are the people who connect to your care around Justice. These are the individuals who share your values and your politics. These are the people who you can go to, to talk politics and to be kept updated and in line. Who are the people you go to seek conversations around Justice? Who are the people that are willing to CHECK YOU, to INVITE YOU IN to a conversation that will make you examine your words, your actions and the way that they connect to justice? Who are the people in your life that you can seek news and resources that are credible to you and that keep you aware and critical?

 

ACTIVITY #4- “I AM” The Most Powerful Statement We Can Make

Materials Needed ·      “I AM” The Most Powerful Statement We Can Make Hand Out

·      Pens and Pencils

Space Preparation ·      Open Space

·      Tables Can be Set Up

·      Put up chart paper with the questions below

 

The vision of Change should begin centered in self-understanding of who we are in the world. What are the ways in which we speak, act, live with justice guiding our intentions? This is the time to be creative, to be in vision, to ReVision what has been what has driven our movements in the world.

 

Standing in who we are is one of the greatest acts of resistance. When we live in the “I AM” that supports our vision and not the “I AM” that keeps us in roles, confinements and states of victimization that are built by oppression and supported by hate, indifference, violence from colonial, patriarchal, white supremacist, capitalistic structures.

 

STEP 1: “I AM” The Most Powerful Statement We Can Make Hand Out and allow yourselves to answer the following questions:

 

  • Who Am I?
    • The Roles I Hold – Who do I serve in this Role? (Feel Free to include specific names)
    • What are my Skills and Talents?
    • What am I passionate about?
  • What is your Vision?
    • What do you hope for in the world?
    • What are the things you stand for?
    • What do you want to create?

STEP 2: MAKE A DECLARATION

Begin here. Answering for yourself in no more than a 3-5 Line Statement:

“Who am I? And what type of World do I Vision? How do I contribute to that Vision?”

Creating your Vision and standing in your truth make your actions more powerful and rooted. Life shifts with the shifting of mindset. It begins here.

Something as simple as the way we eat shifts with our vision in place solidly. Even our fantasies change, when our vision is in line with justice, and we see that we can serve even in the smallest ways, we have no other choice but to do, to act, to live more intentionally than ever before.

 

ACTIVITY #5 – Ceating My Revolutionary Existence (Personal Plan of Action- Daily)

Materials Needed ·      Creating My Revolutionary Existence Hand-Out
Space Preparation ·       Open Space

·      Tables Can be Set Up

·      Create a Creatively Stimulating Playlist

 

This part of the curricula invites us to charge our Daily Living with our visions. How can we look at our day today and understand how placing our Vision at the Center of all we do gives us the opportunity and agency to create an Existence that is Revolutionary.

 

STEP 1: Use the Creating My Revolutionary Existence Hand-Out to think on how your Daily schedule looks like.

What does a Day to Day look like for you?

What are the different activities that fill your day?

Think of EVERYTHING:

  • What time do you have your meals, where do you have them?
  • What time do you sleep, what are your routines around this?
  • Who do you see often?
  • What do you do at School? Your Job?
  • What do you do to unwind?
  • What does a moment on Social Media Look Like for you?

 

STEP 2: Think about how you can shift the way you do the things you listed that happen in your Daily existence. If you did these things in service of your Vision, how might it change the way you do them?

Every action, every word, every breath, of your existence can contribute to the revolution.

 

When we prepare our meals, when we meet to train and exercise our bodies, when we hold our children, when we listen to our elders, when we take time to pause, rest and sleep, when we hold our partner’s hand, when we tell a friend we are here for them, when we sit in community and family in presence and in conversation, when we play and laugh and enjoy, when we take a moment to breathe in the air deeply, when we feel the earth connecting to our feet, when we let the sun embrace us, or the rain wash us, when we say thank you in our prayers for this life we’ve been given- we are contributing to the Revolution. Don’t let anyone take away our freedoms to do these things that make life so miraculous and wonderful.

 

 Do all these things with fullness and Love. Revolution begins here- in us.

Fill the following boxes on the Hand Out with intentions about how you will shift the way you do the things you mentioned in your Daily Routines lead by your Vision, feel free to also remove some of the activities you listed- and add new things that you want to do on your daily.

 

CLOSING MESSAGE FROM JL:

Indifference is our greatest enemy right now and inaction is what will be our detriment. Understand that Action does not only have to come from the pushing for and rejecting of Policy. We need folks to work on that level, yes, petitioning, lobbying, attending town halls and public forums. We also need people in the street protesting in large demonstrations stopping the regularly scheduled programs. We need people who are providing accountable press with full representation of the voices in our communities. We need brothers and sisters to be providing direct services and seeking ways to provide direct services for health, wellness, shelter and all basic needs of living. We need teachers to be bringing awareness to our students, to be instilling in them the agency to make their own movements and create their own Actions. We need all these impactful Actions to be happening

.

And also- Action has to begin at home. Action has to being with you.

 

How are you working in your own households, schools, religious institutions, community spaces and work places to address and act in a way that promotes just learnings and behaviors, that breaks down the presence of intolerance- that does not accept Racism, White Supremacy, Sexism, Homophobia, Xenophobia, or any other forms of Hate and Violence on other human beings?

 

How are you promoting care and protection of our natural resources, our Mother Earth, our sources of living- the Earth, the Waters, the Skies and Air we breathe?

 

Actions come in conversations, they come in artistic expressions and sharing space with communities. Actions come in reading and researching to find understanding of the larger picture and multiple perspectives, they come in connecting with your neighbors. Actions happen on Social Media, when we share, when we speak out, when we challenge the unjust.

Action comes from being present for those in your life, holding space for them to grieve and to feel that they are not alone, whether it be on in person, on the phone, or in a exchange of messages.

 

Action is taking moments to care for yourself, to work on your own self preservation, sleeping, eating well, being out doors, exercising, taking time to do something you Love, praying, hugging the people you Love.

 

There is so much to do right now brothers and sisters. It’s time to do it; wherever you are, with whatever capacity you have. Be in Action.

We are together.

 

Not the Beginning- Continuation: Reflections on the Women’s March in D.C.

I marched in D.C. this past Saturday.

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I chose to make the drive from NYC to be in that particular space of gathering because of my identity as a Pilipina, a Womxn of Color, the daughter, grand daughter and great granddaughter of Immigrants, the teacher and community organizer of Afro-Latinx, Undocumented, Lesbian, Gay, Trans, Poor youth and their families and as an advocate for every underrepresented and unable who could not make it to D.C, or who are not yet in a place of understanding why being visible with our concerns and our perspectives on equality and justice are more important than ever.

I’m writing in reflection and also as a call to action to all of my community, not just my sisters around the world, but anyone who is caring to read this refection and share it with their own communities- even just as a starting dialogue piece.

I’ll start by speaking the obvious that is extremely powerfully, Millions of Women marched in a massive demonstration of Womxn’s solidarity GLOBALLY, in what is being proclaimed to be the largest peacefully gathering in history. This is something to celebrate, to feel a surge of energy from, but my concern is that this will all be displaced, or forgotten because it is not clear to many the deep issues of racism, sexism, nationalism, homophobia, islamophobia, poverty, climate justice (the list can go on) in this country that Trump’s presidency is threatening to make even more severe than we have experienced in decades. He has already begun.

 

Remembering and Understanding Why We are Against Trump

I showed up to the rally in D.C. with a particular eye, surveying the crowds to see the messaging, to hear the conversations, to feel the vibrations of what was truly being stood up for and against.

At the March in Washington D.C. we were surrounded by posters that were messaging so much about Trump having a “Small Dick” and “Tiny Hands” and about his affinity for “Golden Showers,” that to me were all messages of sex shaming and quite frankly distractions- or chants that were like “We want a Leader, Not a Creepy Tweeter.” It was humorous, no doubt, understanding just how much this man is not being taken seriously as a leader of this country, but after the first hour of taking in the outlandishness I was already feeling so deeply unnerved.

Here I was in one of the most packed demonstrations I have ever been in my lifetime and I was searching so deeply for the posters, and banners and the words being amplified that would speak to the devastating issues we are subject to be facing from the Trump administration. Let alone any messaging that represented People Of Color, Indigenous Peoples, Immigrant, LGBT Community issues and so on, and so forth.

The most predominant issues that were seen on banners had to do with Womxn’s health and reproductive rights, which is such an important issue to bring attention to with this being threatened greatly by the Trump administration and the conservative values of the right wing, and also, we have a lot to address around how these rights violations are specifically threatened for those who have other factors of injustice and oppression magnifying their risk and vulnerability. Racism, Immigration, Transexuality, Religious Persecution when intersected with Womxn’s Rights Issues becomes much more severe and life threatening.

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In D.C. it was clear the moment my sister Vanessa Ramalho and I touched down and entered the crowd that the majority that was present were White sisters and their families, I don’t mean to mention this as say that White Cis Womxn should not be present or that their massive presence is not valued, I know that some may hear this in me making this observation, but if that defensiveness is what is arising for you, I invite you understand a different and very important narrative- which is the narrative of the underrepresented and most vulnerable. I note the prevalence of White Cis Womxn at the march, the prevalence of the privileged, the considered, the already highly visible and want us all to understand how when it is the privilege that is most visible and leading that we hear about the issues from privilege lens- which is in this case Womxn’s issues “in general”.

The Privilege narrative allows for us to put on the forefront the overarching Womxn’s issues, that don’t speak to intersectionality. The rights that effect ALL womxn are not just womxn’s rights- they are the rights of ALL. And so, the specific issues that affect particularly Black Womxn or Trans Womxn or Womxn with disabilities or that effect Immigrant Children or that effect Men of Color who are subject to police brutality are extremely important to bring up at the largest public protest gathering in history. To discount these narratives or push them to the side amidst messaging that has to do with Reproductive Rights is where privilege comes in, and where intersectionality is misunderstood.

Intersectionality vs. Divisiveness

 

My presence in D.C. was a hope to link with others who felt the importance of our communities who are affected by all these human rights violations to show up amidst many who may sympathize, but who do not live with a daily experience that a transgendered black man living below the poverty line, or an undocumented afro Latinx boy with learning disabilities, or an indigenous Muslim mother is facing in the wake of this presidential administration. I work with these individuals, to navigate these systems, they are my students and their families, they are my own family, and I know it will take the deeper understanding of those who do not face these issues on the day to day to really make change happen.

 

I want to talk about intersectionality more, and what makes intersectionality truly viable. To have a White Womxn feminist tell me that it is just as important to bring up White Womxn’s rights, as it is to speak on Black Womxn’s rights does not understand the full depth of what it means to be intersectional. The more intersectional we become, the more we understand the importance of addressing issues for those experiencing multiple threats and violations concurrently, which in these lived experiences that are so much more prevalent, but under represented, makes it much more severe than waking up as a White Cis, Middle Class, Christian Womxn who walks in lines of privilege every day they wake up. Intersectionality also invites us to understand the privileges we wake up with and to see where and in which ways having those privileges can give us the power to support those who do not have those same protected experiences. I invite us to wake up every morning and understand our privilege alongside recognition of our disadvantage.

16177543_10104824559201563_1365265666940605849_oIntersectionality is not just the recognition of the representation of all issues of injustice, it is the understanding of the severity and the urgency, in connection to the history and present day relevancies of some of these injustices especially when overlapped over others. And so yes, it is to say that there is a level of importance to speak on some issues, that make some more marginalized and vulnerable to having their livelihoods threatened and disrupted. We have seen and experienced this throughout time and it is now becoming more visible- there are communities who have and continue to be verbally, physical and systematically brutalized by this country’s policies and it is becoming more visible and severe because of Trump’s proposed policies and his overall stance and demeanor in relation to our communities.

Trump, his cabinet and his supporters have made his presidency reason to resurface Hate in this country in real tangible ways in the House, in the Senate, on the Streets, on our Social Media Feeds.

 

Actionable Steps, Moving Forward

 

One of the reasons why I decided to march in D.C. is because of the release of the platform principles of the march.  These principles spoke clearly my shared values that All Human Rights Violations are Womxn’s Rights Violations. And when I talk about intersectionality I think on how intersectional my own experience is in relation to these threats on human rights. I look to these and I share the concern of many organizers about what happens past the march. I question why there was not more that was actionable during and after the gathering. I looked for the individuals who were holding the petitions in hand, and passing out the informational pamphlets around proposed policies to fight against, I looked for the presence of camaraderie in the crowd. And I understood that there was lacking

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I know that there is much guidance to be given, to those who are just beginning to feel the urgency at all to even join a rally march, let alone understand how to make it more impactful than just mass presence. I wonder how many actually read about these platforms or understood how hard Womxn of Color fought for our presence and visibility at that march.  I wonder how many stopped to listen to Sophie Cruz in ratio to listening to Maxwell singing “This Woman’s Work.”

Many people in my life, including my parents and so many elders who have experienced much blatant discrimination, segregation and brutalization in this country, have told me:

“You can’t do anything about it now. He’s already our President.”

“Let’s just give him a chance.”

“Be careful with what you are saying, and what you are doing opposing him. It’s dangerous.”

My response, is that I will stand up and resist every moment I see injustice, without fear, because I know we can shift the outcomes. We don’t have to continue to be victims to this country- more than ever the things we have been fighting against are being seen by those who did not believe they still existed in this “free country.” Trump and his white supremacist, capitalistic, patriarchal, war mongering followers are making it visible, are making those who were more complacent to these issues feel the effects that many of us organizing in our communities throughout our lifetimes have already felt. They are turning to us for guidance, for leadership, for understanding.

My father called me yesterday after he saw photos of me in D.C. with the concern that being so outspoken was dangerous, that I would be seen as a “vicious, rioting protestor, with nothing better to do.”   And I told him that I didn’t want to wait until things were as bad as we are seeing in our own Motherland in the Philippines. I asked him “Are we going to wait until we are stripped even further of our right to any health care if you are of a poor background? Are we going to wait until they start encampments and registries of our people, like they did with the Japanese? Are we going to wait until they segregate restaurants and public spaces? Are we going to wait until this government is instating militia on the street and gunning us down?”

My dad listened as I told him- “Dad, I know you didn’t work so hard all these years for me to have a better life, a free and prosperous life beyond what you had to face amidst confronting racism and prejudice- just so that I would have to face those same things or worse. I will put myself in danger if it means that I will be helping so many more including you and mom, and my future children won’t have to suffer.” He responded by telling me stories of how bad it was in the 70’s and 80’s in the US and the Philippines, and that I won’t have to worry about that because that is not how things are anymore. I told him, they are- and they will get worse if we don’t say something and do something now. He said I was hard-headed.

I am.

16266028_10101544823658000_3337479489685374354_nAnd I am this way because my grandmother and my parents taught me through their actions of resistance- that was their labor and their persisting in this country to build a life for their children and my children and future generations to come. I won’t back down, because they didn’t. And I will start at home, making sure that those I grow with and surround myself with will stand up for what is just and what is right, and see urgency to resist unjustice before it becomes more life threatening than it already is.

My fear has always been that the urgency will only come as things worsen, as we experience Trump’s policies and proclaimed wars and destruction of our natural resources and homes come to fruition.  I have already seen millions rise together. What would that look like if we did so with a more radical agenda than just to impeach this man- because let’s face it Mike Pence is no better, he may be worse. My call is for dramatic shifts in the way we see change in this country- to think deeply on what it means to be self-determined, what it means to be truly liberated and how that begins with your own individual words, actions, and values that you uphold in your everyday living.

Showing up at the March in D.C. was important to me. I carried my signs with representation of Indigenous, Pilipino, Spiritual An-sisters and Womb*n and I will continue to write and draw and speak and act and move and live in a way that keeps in mind the power of Womxn to make deep change, and uphold future generations to come. This is the greatest thing to understand if you are looking for next actions- the work does not BEGIN now, it has already been forged by so many, it is time to continue with greater visible force than ever before. Look to those who have before and are currently fighting for justice in this country and learn from them, receive lessons from them about what resistance looks like, take time to even just LISTEN as an action. This is not the beginning, it is a continuation.

“I am Abundantly Valuable”

I have been unpacking a core limiting belief throughout my growing as an artist, that “I am not good enough.”  And that belief has tied in deeply to my ability to truly envision and manifest abundant exchange for what I create in the world.

This is a Spiritual Wound that has been passed down through the generations of my people’s colonized existence. It is a part of the ancestral burden that they never knew would be carried on by their descendants- a belief that was planted in my heart by my parents, and by theirs before them, and their parent’s parents and further back yet, as my family has had at least 5 generations here in the US, the center of capitalistic, patriarchal, white supremacist governance. And before that generations of our lineage were inflicted with wounds from countless colonizers who fed beliefs of inferiority, of dehumanization, of diminished self and communal worth. The more I understand this, the more I confront how these beliefs come up in my daily living and how they are driven by a misguided sense of worth and value.

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I am in a moment of my life where I am confronting it more fully than ever, and I am seeing how much Money has become key to what keeps that wound existent. We can quantify worth by monetary wealth, and we do, we have set up systems, and structures that support this being a truth for all of us. We allow ourselves to determine the value of a human being with ease just by looking to the amount of money they have, and their ability to consume and contribute to this time we are living in where capitalistic Value has become so crucial to existence, that it is a key determinant of survival.

So if you do not make enough money, not only are you faced with the inability to live in health and wellness, but you also are seen as devalued by society and in turn devalued in self.   As I examine this wound, this belief that “I am not good enough,” and how it is connected to capitalism and my survival- it becomes even more important that I open the wound that it represents even further and see it fully for what it has been doing to my spirit. I understand the societal construction of these beliefs, how capitalism has and continues to serve those who adhere to the constructs of division and inequality that keep a fraction of this existence in power over others and make them in control of who benefits from resources natural, manmade and also the labor resources that come from human beings all together. These constructs have been created to tell me my value, someone else has the power to determine that, and to mark my worth by a dollar.

And they have convinced those who love me most in my life and see me for all I am to feel they need to do the same.

My family gave me many gifts and lessons to uplift my being, they taught me to work hard- that labor would reap benefits, that the satisfaction of accomplishing, of producing, of creating what I intend to would grow me into greatness. They also taught me to find humility and humble myself through having immense gratitude for life, that even in moments of triumph and achievement to remember that many people, many experiences  and God/the Creator, contribute to my ability to succeed. They also simply believed in me, they saw the manifestation of their dreams and my own living out through my existence. You would think that this would be enough for me to thrive in this world, but what also exists within me are the more insidious beliefs that were instilled in my ancestral bloodline by a world driven by power over others, and not just the power of living fully in self.

And as I have been unpacking here, in this existence, power has been accepted as being tied to capital. And for those who have been taught that they have little to no power above the governing bodies that are in place, capital has been tied to survival. This is the story that I have been raised to believe- that money is the final marking of my ability to step into my greatest power, because it will assure my survival. This is what my parents were taught as well, and so in contradiction to all the beautiful beliefs that they taught me so I can see myself as great- there were also messages laced with the need to show for that greatness with monetary wealth. And because I have not been able to attain this in my almost 30 years of living, I have not yet reached a place of full potential in their eyes and in many moments, my own.

I hear the echoes of their concern that I have not yet “Made it,”-  “I don’t know why you don’t just find a better job… I don’t know what is happening to you out there, but you need to figure it out, you need to make more money, maybe you need to just look for work that is outside of your field…” By speaking their beliefs out loud in this way, I have been put in positions where I have examined my work as worthless, because I know, to them, that in all the communities that I have and continue to serve, with all the creations I have birthed and all the artistic expression that I have poured out of me, with all of the love I have given to everyone of my students and colleagues and any relationship I have built in my artistic, activist and spiritual work, it still is NOT ENOUGH, because I still do not MAKE ENOUGH MONEY to show for the work I do.

I know they mean well when they say,”You’re so smart/talented/hardworking you can do so many other things that will pay you more… why don’t you find something else to do, there has to be someone who will pay you more for your work, you can do better…,” they  are seeking to encourage me and remind me of my gifts and they are also telling me, that without the monetary exchange I am being undervalued- I am not living in my full value.

I have pushed myself to remove my mindset from the need of that monetary recognition, because I have convinced myself that the type of labor, no matter how arduous I work, in this world, cannot reap those rewards. I have taught my self to live at the barest means, from pay check to pay check, without need for extraneous spending, without need for any materials, experiences that may be luxuries and mostly it has made me see how broken the world is because of its capitalistic structures of living. I understand that value goes deeper than monetary worth, that we have lost sight of that, as a society that has invested in the doctrine that allows us to believe that with the existence of money we can determine whether an individuals has the worth to live the fullness of life,  that allows us to divide ourselves between the wealthy and the impoverish.  We live in a world where self worth is diminished with lack of monetary gain. And I have told myself not to accept that, that my value should not be tied to money- which is in principle, so true, and yet I have suffered many times because I have refused to believe that I need money to be held as such a high determinant of my worth. How do I even begin to shift, to say “Okay, I accept that I need and want more money, to show for my worth in what I create and what I labor and give to this world.” It feels almost like giving up and giving into something that I have worked so hard to not. But why?

I don’t want to tell myself the things I have heard about adhering to the workings of capitalism the messages that say, “that is just how things are…the world is not going to change,” and play into the idea that I need to fall in place like everyone else. I won’t make this the belief that drives the shift I am making in welcoming monetary value into my life, because it will not help to heal the ancestral wound of being “good enough” and seeing my self-worth being abundant- because I understand how money is a construction that has replaced the need to understand fully our whole value of being.  It is not the whole determinant of self value, it is not the core determinant of self value, but in this world it is part of it. I’m working on accepting this so much more than ever, and it is difficult, because I have worked against living with this lens that intentionally placed any value of self on money.

As I dream of a life with my partner where I can raise a family with him, where we can grow our children in a home that we call ours and can give them the opportunities to grow with enrichment of experiences and connection to life, I think of how money is necessary to do these things. And I pause and confront deeply my continued ideas of living at my barest needs and not asking for more monetary exchange, because of the two fold belief that I should not buy into the capitalistic marking of value, and that I would not be able to attain that anyway because I never have. I understand Value in a deeper way than just being determined by monetary worth, and also, I need to live. I need to survive. I need to experience this living beyond the narrative of struggle and oppression that is written with capitalistic divide. And so I am teaching myself  to see all the notions of value being important for me to accept in abundance, because I am worth all of it. 

Everything that I create in this world of art, expression, relationships, community, sacred space, and existence is valuable. I am valuable, by all means. All I create has abundant value. All I give in labor and service has abundant value. All I contribute with my living has abundant value. I am abundantly valuable. My value is abundant. This is the belief I am intending to live by, that will include exchange that gives to the monetary value of my creations, of my labors, of my contributions to this living, because although it is not the center of value and self worth in my life, it still is a means of value in this world and I believe that I am worth all of what this world has to offer. I believe we all are.

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Prayer of Responsibility

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Woke up Early and Needed to Pray. I was affirmed by Ate Grace Nono how important it is to understand Prayer as communication. You are not the only one who is speaking to the Divine Ancestors speak to and through you in Exchange. This morning I woke from a dream of many dishes in a sink needing to be washed. And my hands went to do the duty and the dishes became bodies and the sink became the ocean, and I was there scrubbing these bodies that were very much alive and I was crying and crying. I felt myself trembling and shaking, but I did not stop. I felt a deep responsibility to cleanse those bodies. They were being prepared to be used for a great rite. This is what I felt. I woke up and prayed.

This is what I heard within me, in communication with ancestors.

“Prayer of Responsibility”

I know my responsibility to my Ancestors
I have dug up their memories
Their words
Their lived lessons
Their collective actions
And in ceremony of similar waking battles
I’m replanting these remnants into my bones
Creating armor for my spirit
With deep understanding of
What it means for us to have to rise
More unified than ever before
To lead from Love
To act through Prayer

To protect the Sacred

My Ancestors are telling me
It is more than right
It is more than belief
It is truth
To be Free

I hear them
And it is my responsibility
To be
Free

This is not just the message of my Ancestors
Who fought in revolutions
In land battles
And in wars

Freedom echoes from
The Trees
The Clouds
The Ripples and the Waves
Our greatest guides
The Grand Mothers and Grand Fathers of us all

With the fires of the Sun in day
Reflecting on the moon at night,
Constantly lighting our way
Through darkness…
They remind me that they are our collective guardians
And they are still rising for us ALL
Just like they rose for others
Many, many generations before
I hear them
I understand what they are calling on us
To do

To be
Free:
Our Responsibility

To Protect
To Honor
To Defend

All that is Sacred
I know you hear their messages too

To Protect
To Honor
To Defend-
What is Sacred

But

You have misunderstood
You aren’t listening in the deep way I have
You hear Sacred is Towers scraping the Sky
You hear Sacred is Pipes penetrating the Waters
You hear Sacred is Concrete clearing away theLand
You hear Sacred is Construct
You hear Sacred is Coverings
You hear Sacred is Skin

You have not heard the Sacred within
You have not heard the humility of human being
You have not heard the humbling of wonderment
And so you have lost the ability to hear even echoes
From what came before any tellings of divide and conquer
Before the messages of supremacy and hate,
Before the lessons of constructs that were made
To make us see each other as Other
Forgetting we belong to the Land, the Sky and the Waters
The Same
Forgetting we belong to Eachother
That is why
You cannot hear your brothers and sisters screaming, right in front of your face
You have blocked out their pleas to your humanity
You have disregarded thier prayers to your spirit
You misunderstand

And so Our Ancestors
Tell us to shake you further
To tear down walls you are building
To destroy the machines you have built to rupture and wreck
To place our bodies before your own
And look you in the eye
And pierce into you the truths
Through our tears and our trembling
We are channeling
We will not let you look away

Even if it means that you will beat us bloody
Even if it means more will be lost
We do not die just for our communities, and our families
We die for our Ancestors

OUR Ancestors

We know our responsibility to them
And to eachother

It is our Responsibility
To remind you
To make you listen

Listen further
Not to Ego
Listen further
Not to Fear
Listen further
Not to Confusion
Go further
Not to Guilt
Go further
Not to Shame
Listen further
To the Freedom Ringing

From Ancestors crying
Through us
I hear them
Can you hear them?

It is your Responsibility too
They are your Ancestors too

Can you hear them?

“Protect
Honor
Defend
The Sacred”

“ALL is Sacred”
“ALL is Sacred”
“ALL is Sacred”

That is our responsibility
The responsibility to the Sacred
The responsibility to each other

To be Free.

Our responsibility.

Release, Re-Member, Reclaim-Healing the Activist, Teacher, Artist, Healer, and Warrior (Curriculum for Holding and Uplifting Leaders in All Communities)

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The reflection I have had with many of my closest circles is that we are in a time when because of widespread urgency from a very real imminent threat on our communities, with the election of Donald Trump, we are being called on around us and within ourselves to serve our communities deeper than ever before. It is such a complex feeling to look around you and see people who you could never get to a rally, or who never cared to talk “politics” finally show a sense of need to MOVE. For those of us whose life’s work has been connected to serving the dismantling of the system, decolonizing mentalities, resisting the structures of oppression that have always been in place, defending and protecting communities, speaking and helping others to speak who feel they cannot, healing those (including ourselves) who have been broken by experiences of hate, violence and inhumanity of this country – this time is very different- because this time we are not working behind a veil or iron curtain, this time those who could not see, can see because it’s being lifted so abruptly and loudly to the surface. And because of it they also are looking to us to lead.


It is complex in the way that it feels so important to be there ready with urgency, to respond to that call to lead, and also, in moments it feels like we didn’t have to let it come to this, had all those that are waking up because of the very real violence and threat that is happening with immediate response in the streets. They are seeing what we as activists and community workers, just how much we were being fooled into upholding a system that has been built upon the back, the bones and the blood of the marginalized. I release this, because this is not the time to divide and stand in any resentment rooted in ego- this is rather the time that we have to look to one another and invite a more powerful unity than ever before. I take deep breaths and look to all those around me rising, and I hold together the pieces of my heart that have been aching and I speak, I act, I create from my deepest prayers of love, that I have always held and I seek to remind us that we belong to each other, and we have so much work we can finally do TOGETHER so that truth can ring the truest for all of humanity.

This curriculum is for my organizers, because we need to be held to. We need to be healed in the deep processes of healing, we forget this so much sometimes.

Release, Re-Member, ReclaimHealing the Activist (Curriculum for Holding and Uplifting Leaders in All Communities)

Activity #1: Grounding Ourselves in What We Want to Call In 

Check-In: What is something that you want to call into the space to energize and uplift our gathering today?

Activity #2: Release- Uncovering the Layers that Weigh on Our Spirits 

Everyone will be invited to stand in a circle and have a piece of paper and a writing utensil behind them that they will use when called to. The idea is that we will be releasing the things that we are holding that keep us from rising fully in our work of serving others. Each stage will be different.

Stage 1: The Simply Stated

There will be exchanges in the circle answering questions posed and making one word statements to be answered. When everyone has finished each person will go to their paper and write what has been released. Then return to the circle. The idea is that this is a circle of energy, so we need to make sure that we keep it up, that we cultivate in a way where nothing is dropped, but it is held, and then released onto the paper. I will help to keep the energy moving. With each question or prompt, someone will begin and the energy will flow to the left, closest to our hearts. Keep your answers succinct.

Use these or Come Up With Others, Do 5-7 Prompts:

 

  • Release a sound that releases everything that you have been carrying since hearing the results of the election and having to confront the reality of what the world is carrying

 

      • **You may want to have them release this sound multiple times- throughout the exchange.

 

  • What is a word that describes how you felt the moment that you found out about the results of the election?
  • What is one thing that you FEAR most about the results of the election for your communities?
  • What is one thing that you FEAR most about the results of the election for yourself?
  • What is something that you have heard, or read that made you ANGRY in relation to the way others have been processing the results of the election?
  • What is something that you have heard, or read that made you SAD in relation to the way others have been processing the results of the election?
  • Who is someone you WORRY about because of the result of the election?

 

Stage 2: Flowing Stream of Thought

In this round we will release fully, let it all flood out of you- sounds and word, but support it with movement continuously moving through the room as you speak what you are saying, let it support the release of your words. Let it be what it needs to be without judgement, be loud, RELEASE!  And also use your body to help with the release, shake it off, rub it off, from your head to your toes. I will speak a topic and you will release.

Use these or Come Up With Others, Do 4-5 Prompts:

  • Donald Trump
  • White Supremacy
  • Hate
  • Ignorance
  • Systematic Oppression
  • Capitalism
  • People who Are Racist, Sexist, Homophobic, Islamaphobic

Stage 3: Deep Listening Exchange

In this round we will create exchange. Carry your paper and your pen in your hand. We will be in touch exchange the entire time that we are in this round. Touch is a part of communication that we often leave out, this is an invitation to hold one another, to exchange energy that is connected to deep listening. Everyone pair up with someone in the space and you will,use a touch of intention to be a recognition of holding that person in listening exchange. Then you will take turns answering the questions that are posed. I will give 2 Minutes for one person in your pair to answer and 2 minutes for the other for each question.

Do your best to not let go of each other, instead think about the exchange being one that is continuously holding. Make sure to thank your partner each time.

Use these or Come Up With Others, Do 3 Prompts:

 

  • What are the things that you feel you are carrying since hearing the results of the election?
  • What are moments that you have witnessed that have shook the reality you were living before the results of the election?

 

  • What are the large things that you are tackling in your communities right now that you feel are your responsibility and the heaviest for you to hold?

 

Stage 4: Individual Reflection

This is a time for freewrite, for anything else that needs to be released

Last Step Letting Go- to Make Room for Letting In

The next step is to release these, I usually opt to burn them away, and let them be carried away with the fire. But I know this can be difficult with large groups, you also can tear them up and bury them- or instruct folks to do it on their own accord.

We must look at these feelings, listen deeply to ourselves and understand how we hold space for each other and give to school other to help heal and fill from the places we confront and release.

Activity #3: Re-Member- From Victim to Vision (Shifting our Language and Mindset to Empower Our Movements) 

This portion of the work will be directed toward our understanding of self and where we hold ourselves as a community and individuals from rising. How can we check ourselves in this.

Chart this out:

From Victim to Vision

(Making sure to give homage to source understanding that these are universal knowledges that have been codified) Adapted from the El Puente Global Justice Institute and the work of David Gershon & Gail Straub at the Empowerment Institute

Make examples of this in relation to the elections, how we as individuals and as a community are already doing these things on all ends, from Trump Supporters, to mixed responses from those against Trump results.

The Four Characteristics of Victimhood:

1) Blaming

2) Complaining

3) Justifying

4) Staying in a State of Confusion

**Where have you been living victim in your life? Where have you seen others living victim?**

Think about how our communities and selves are living in victim, and have been living in victm. How do we move to vision?

Small Groups: Reflect on these concepts and ideas in particular around the happenings that have occurred in the last couple of days. We will do this in small groups.

Share and write down what comes up for you as a group.

Large Group:  What are some things that came up? Some things that we have witnessed and participated in that keep us in victim?

(Chart This)

To move from Victim to Vision we must move from:

“Fixing” –> “Creating”

“Healing” –> “Excelling/ Thriving”

“Reacting” –> “Envisioning”

“Healing is very important- but often our greatest commitment to healing develops out of a desire and a vision to have a more empowering perspective on our lives. This vision can provide tremendous incentive to MOVE.”

We are more equipped than we ever have been to make the change that will push forward the plight of our ancestors. We have the knowledge, the capacity, the technology, the numbers that make us no longer the minority- to finally make the change we wish to see.

The movements have been growing and growing and the way we communicate, the way we congregate, the way we strategize has advanced more and more. We are creating consistently. We are remembering that before all else, we as human beings are creators and so long as we continue with deep intention, to move from victim to vision.

Individual Time: Take a moment to write a declaration to yourself about what it means for you to move from Victim to Vision and hold space for others in your life to do the same in this time of needed Healing.

Activity #4: Reclaim and Re-Visioning the Self In Power

Vision Boards are an activity meant to help you manifest images that will serve to remind you of your purpose and sacred calling, to bring to light what you wish to create from your imaginings and from your desires inside you of the life you wish to live. These are usually constructed on large paper, a board or can be manifested in many different ways- ie. Books, shadowboxes, sculptures, etc. You can use Magazine cuttings, images from books, photographs, print outs and can also create images through drawing or painting- the sky is the limit just as our visions of creating our lives are..

Materials Needed:

  •             Image Materials- Magazines, Image Books, Scrap Fabric, Printouts, Photos, Stickers, Drawing paper, etc.
  •             Scissors, Exacto Knives
  •             Paint, Markers, Crayons, Pencils, Pens, etc.
  •             Adhesive- Glue, Tape, Glue Gun/Sticks

It is important in all facilitation to create the environment/ space to hold the energy that you wish to create. In this particular exercise the setup of the room is the most important. Take the time to form with the image materials that you have collected a labyrinth- a maze created for spiritual reflection and meditation (ie. a spiral  pathway, or a maze within a circle in any configuration that you feel would be to the energy you wish to cultivate- example below). Set up the space with the other materials in the middle of the room.

images

These are the Prompts That Will Lead Your Visioning:

 

  • Where are you rooted- what communities have you been placed in? What
  • What role you play in your communities, how do you hold that role?
  • Who is in your circle? Who are your mirrors? Who holds you? Builds with you? Creates with you?
  • What universal lessons have you received that you are sharing forward
  • What skills and talents do you offer to the your family, your communities, to the world?
  • What is the world you are contributing to that you may never live in, that will be our childrens’?

 

. Opening Meditation:

Start by taking a deep breathe, in through your nose, filling up your lungs, and then breathe out of your mouth. And continue breathing in through your nose breathing in presence, and with an exhale breathing out and releasing through your mouth. With each breath release anything that is pulling you away from this moment. Continue in this pattern of breathing in presences and releasing distractions, attachments, and anything calling you away from this moment with your breath.

Let yourself see how your breath moves through you, and let that breath fill you in a way that helps you re-member your entire self from your head to your toes and out your fingertips. See how your breath connects to your physical being, and how every curve, every dip, every dimple, every wrinkle on your body is connected to a history and a herstory, a legacy before you, a story of ancestry shaped by geography, by experience, by walks, by adventures, by battles and wars waged, by moments of stillness, and by prayer. Every part, every muscle, every organ. every bone, every vein, every cell, every particle was a gift from your ancestors. Connect this all with your breath with gratitude, with remembrance and then with a breath of intention gently let it float away, so what is revealed to you is your soul.

See how your soul is also connected to your ancestry, a history and a herstory, a legacy before you, a story of ancestry shaped by wonderment, by belief, by heartache, by struggle, by joys, and by love. See what they lived out so you could become and what they dreamed you would become. See how your existence is a piece of something they prayed would live beyond them. Remember yourself so deeply in this way. Connect the dreams your ancestors dreamed in you with the ones you dream for those who will come after you. As you live out your Sacred Calling today. How do you serve? Who do you serve? What do you give to the world? What can you give in a deeper more intentional way?

Know this “You are a living ancestor.” How can each experience serve your learning, your growing, your creating, your living? How can this very experience serve your learning, your growing, your creating, your living? What are you Reclaiming? What is the world you are contributing to that you may never live in, that will be our childrens’? What will you give to the building and creating of that tomorrow? Starting in this very moment? In this very room? Release, Remember, Reclaim- and let this be what heals you in your action and your creation.

Who are you? What does it look like for you to stand fully in your power? How does it begin here? How does it contribute to the greater Legacy of who you are and will become for the upliftment of the future.

Take 3 last deep breaths on your own time, and with each breath allow yourself to give gratitude, to return back to your body, putting back together every particle, every cell, every vein, every bone, every organ, every muscle, back into your skin. And whenever you are ready just start putting vibration back in your fingers and toes, take a stretch and then with the most ease and gentleness open your eyes.

Take three more breaths in on your own time. And when you’re ready hold onto that vision and ever so slowly, ever so gently, open your eyes.

1)         Have the participants walk the labyrinth set up with the magazines preferably one by one, following these steps

  •             State your intention as clearly as possible– in this instance to find the images that were awakened in their vision.
  •             Center yourself by taking a couple of deep breaths. This is important because doing this you instruct your subconscious and all other parts of yourself to pay attention to your sincere wish of solving your problem.
  •             Acknowledge your coming meditative or spiritual journey within the labyrinth. You may also say a short prayer or smudge yourself, depending on which faith you adhere to. Closing your eyes and reflecting or taking a simple bow are other nice ways to begin the process.

o   Decide whether you will walk barefoot or with shoes on. With bare feet, you can feel the texture of the earth beneath your feet and connect to its grounding forces.

  •             Begin your walk. The first step sets the pace for your walk. It can be fast or slow. Choose your intention for the walk. Are you being spiritual, reflective, mindful, playful, creative or something else? If you’re problem solving, your walk becomes a meditation when you surrender all your problems and just walk. Other parts of you have now a chance to process your request of a solution.
  •             Continue to walk. Keep your mind quiet, and still pestering thoughts each time they arise. Concentrate on the placement of one foot before the other and rhythmic, gentle and regular breathing.

o   Surrender to walkng with mindfulness of what surrounds you. Let all else fall off your shoulders. Various parts of your being are now processing your wish for solution. Let it be and let go of any expectations. Let it all go. Surrender to the experience of walking the labyrinth.

  •             Find your answers in the Labyrinth. As you walk pick up the images that you feel call most to you that speak to your vision. Try to only pick up 2-3 to begin with and then on your way out of the circle 2-3 more. When you reach the center, pick up the materials you need and walk out of the circle.
  •             Accept the insights and gifts you may have received. Adopting a sense of gratitude will always facilitate resolutions. Offer your thanks for what you have retrieved.
  •             Find a space to Reflect, Pause, and Create. Find a space for self and pause there for awhile, sit or lay down if you feel like it and meditate or reflect. The main thing is to let yourself surrender totally to your inner process. It feels so good to have all the time you need.

o   Begin constructing your Vision Board with the collected materials.

o   If you don’t have a problem, question or quest for inspiration, just sit quietly and let things be.

Gallery Walk- Group Share: Everyone will display their Vision boards on a chair with their statement of visioning and everyone will get post-its that they will use to write messages to those whose boards and declarations speak to them.

Once everyone has gone around, go back to your board and give yourself a moment to sit with what has been given to you. And then come back to the big circle when I call you back.

Big Group Reflection: How are you feeling? What is coming up for you?

*Give time for reflections

 

When I say the time is NOW it’s because this time is very different and for everyone who sees and didn’t before- we have work to do because many still do not see, and many do not want us to see. The time is NOW. If you are called to protest then fill the streets, if you are called to educate then gather folks to exchange in knowledge and equip them with the understanding they need to stand with youand share the knowledge further, if you are called to create then create so powerfully it will move masses, if you are called to give of monetary support then give everything you can to those who are on the ground serving, if you are called to heal- remember in the process to heal yourself, whatever you are doing- let it be with Love of our brothers and sisters and let it be to uplift us in a time when it is easy to feel like we are drowning- rise up, make change, we are together.

Closing: The most powerful and healing statement we can offer ourselves is- “I AM” to close we will say one thing that we are taking away and say an “I AM” statement speaking the person we choose to be for this community and all communities that we hold space for and serve in this time of deep healing.

Liberty and Justice for ALL Curriculum (For Classrooms with Students Divided on Election Results)

***This Curriculum has been put together to address the concern of speaking with a class that has both Trump Supporters and those from marginalized communities.  

I would begin before doing this curricula, if your class is strongly divided, by having students do a private reflection that you can take home with you and read that gives you information about how the students think of Donald Trump as President. Prompt: Do a free write about  what the next 4 years of Donald Trump’s presidency looks like for your students.

Then provide space privately for students who need the extra support and look to the #IAmNotAfraid Curriculum: http://bit.ly/2g11BGe

Activity #1: Liberty and Justice for All

Check-In: Write “LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL” out on a board or poster paper largely in the front of the room, or center of the circle. Have students reflect on what this phrase means to them as their check in. (Chart this)

We are going to be discussing the foundations of  what it means to be in a country that is based on the idea of having “Liberty and Justice for All” and what it means for a President to uphold and protect this.

Activity #2: My President Should…

When you imagine a person who leads you, who protects and defends your rights and freedoms, who is a representative of who you are and what you live for, who would they be? reflect on what a president should be like? what type of person would your president be? We will be reflecting on this together.

Small Group: Give each student this handout that helps to break down the role of the President and their ideal as to how they should lead.

My President.jpg

Large Group: Let them reflect individually with the hand out then bring them back to the big group.  Have a large silhouette charted out and write what comes up for them.

What came up for you? Share with us one of the most important things you wrote in your individual reflection. Have the students reflect on what platforms President Trump is standing on.

Put up another silhouette and have the students share the way in which Donald Trump has and says he will lead. Answer the questions the same as they are in the hand out but directed toward him.

  1. What knowledge has Donald Trump show he has to lead this country?
  2. What are things that a he has said? What kind of words has he spoken directed toward the people of the United States
  3. How has he/ has he not- shown love and compassion for the people of the United States? What would you want a president to feel about you, your friends, your family, your community?
  4. How is he standing up for all the people of the United States? How has he inspired courage from us?
  5. What has he said he would create to serve us to create progression for all the people of the United States?
  6. What example has he made? What actions has he done in his life, in the way he lives that he is leading by?

Have the students reflect on this comparison of what President they want  to lead them, and how Donald Trump is declaring he will and has already lead? What are things that they feel need to be addressed in his leadership and how can it be addressed?

Activity #3: Dear Mr. President….

Take a look at the things you would want to ask Donald Trump to consider, to change, to understand in order for him to be a President that a young person like you could look up to. How do you think he should act, speak- what do you think he should create to uphold the LIBERTY and JUSTICE of all People?

Write this letter as honestly as you can, in your own voice, tell him what you want from a president that represents you.

Give the students time to write on their own time and then have them share with the whole group.

Make room for discussion about the importance of holding a President, and all government and judiciary leaders to their DUTY of upholding the Liberty and Justice of us all. Talk to them about how important it is to act on an every day to also uphold these truths as a citizen of the US. How are we treating each other on a daily basis? How do we inspire fairness and compassion for everyone around us.

Closing: What is one thing you are taking away? What is something that you will do to uphold Liberty and Justice today, in the way you speak, your actions or the way you treat someone?

*Offer students the ability to check in with you individually, much will come up there after.

5 Lessons


It’s important for me to take moments of rest and distance from the intensities of living day to day. I have learned the necessity of replenishing my well and how crucial it is to seek to do this with the support of those who speak similar language of life and spirit with me, who walk the world with me in parallel paths of lightwork-purpose-sacred calling, and who seek to honor and uplift the living, creation, guides and the ancestors all around us. I take these moments to gather and reflect on learnings, to sit with my circles I have met and built with in my growing and ready them to be shared in prayer of words, action and creation. 


Last weekend, I exchanged in sacred sisterhood rooted in spirit, a tradition for Undas (Philippines Day of the Dead) I began last year when I gathered with sisters for ceremony of my first sacred Inking in Montreal. That trip was a definitive moment where I recognized sacred sisterhood surrounded my existence. This year on Undas my visit was to Toronto filled with light of ancestral spirit, sisterhood, children and elder wisdoms. 
I want to share 5 of these lessons that emerged to teach me and that I now carry as part of my deepest prayers, in this time in my life.
1) Create Boundaries So You Can Tend to Your Path And Listen Deeper
Our sister Maria who manages the Elder Lodge Dodem Kanonhsa'(Clan Lodge) in Toronto, Canada shared deep stories of her awakening, of her spiritual teachers and how she has recently been thrusted into her path through her dreamtime moving into her waking and her healing work presenting itself in a crisis of abundance. She has recently been feeling her power of holding healing, uniting, sacred spirit space and what her body has taught her in taking her time for her own healing. Pains, ailments, wounds persist when the healer does not re-member to heal themselves. She reflected on the ability to close the door (literally to her office) in moments of needing to rest, to say no with grace and to be at ease with doing only as much as her spirit can allow- which requires the deep listening. She taught the lesson of boundaries especially for those of us who do healing and guidance work and reminded us to take care of self when doing work with and for spirit. Not only can we replenish, but we can also process and reflect our relations and exchanges from spirit in a good way.


2) Surrender to Spirit, Accept Yoir Path and Trust Yourself
My sisters Aimee and Jen of Kapwa Collective and our Ojibwe sister Amy trusted me the facilitation of holding ceremony for Sacred Dance intimately and with deep intention to hold one another in a moment of exploration. It was in this circle that we all learned how Surrender, Acceptance and Trust allows for the deepest healing. We each explored our separate and similar needs when giving in to a moment of deep connection with our spirits in dance. We explored the idea of fighting with our spiritual callings in relation to our physical lives, denying ourselves truth of what is being imparted to us from our guides and ancestors. We explored the affirmation of “Yes” and what it means to express our deepest desires without apology, but instead with excitement and confidence. We explored what it is like to accept healing from others and seek their support and affirmation and deny the healer within us to be trusted, to be given the power to give to self. And we explored the dance and how when you follow your path, the signs, the symbols, the senses of your being- you arrive exactly where you are supposed to. All these lessons rooted in Surrender, Acceptance and Trust.


3) Adopt Family and You Will Never Be Alone 
I sat with my sister Jen in exchange with Elder Grandma Rene Thomas-Hill at Dodem, who shared with us beautiful lessons of living. I expressed her my lonely heart as she felt heaviness there for me. She spoke to me of my light and how it was important for me to be that light even in the darkest places and how when I allow for that to be that I will find the light of others who are shining the same, and it is our job to help others find that light and turn it on in them as well. She said that it was okay for me to be different, it is special and that it is a duty to shine. I expressed to her moments when I have felt people leave me because of my being myself in this way, the image of light shining in the darkness and people approaching the light I shine, but then disregarding it. She said we all have to come to this in our own time, many are not ready to be with the light of truth, of spirit. But the important thing is to seek connection with those who I can call family, that I will know who these people are. she said, When I am without a sister I can adopt a sister, when I need a mother I can seek a mother in community to hold me, when I need a grandma I can adopt a grandma. And that they are there for me as I am there for them. My sister Jen added the presence of my ancestors and guides as spirit family always with me. 


4) HEAL Others- HEAL Yourself
Another lesson from Grandma Rene was the lesson of Healing others and ourselves as an exchange. She particularly spoke of the relationship between man and woman and the need for us to Heal eachother and to remember we were made to balance one another, to be in duality and exchange with eachother as the creator made us, like our two hands, two eyes, two ears work in tandem. She spoke of the need for us to help our brothers our men to cry to release and she told us ways to support this, that the mere action of creating a fist transmits anger to our hearts. She told us to teach them and ourselves that the opening of our hands, the holding and uniting of our hands the use of our hands to caress the head, to hold the shoulder, to embrace, to give warmth, these all are important for man and woman to learn to heal each other. She also said that we have a responsibility to one another in this way of healing because there is so much to rise from everyday. She emphasized self care, to do things that would support of spirits to be well. She told us to practice patience as a daily learning and give ourselves the time and space to listen to the messages that will come to us on our journey to put them together to help us find Peace in our living. 


5) We All Belong
Ate B who is a visiting Elder from the Manobo Tribe in Mindanao spoke with me of the lesson in understanding the role we play in life, the duty we have been given to serve in a very specific and perfect way. She spoke to me the lessons as follows:

I cried to her

“WHAT AM I LIVING FOR?”

I am losing my mind.

This world does not support my

Sense of justice, 

Sense of belonging 

Sense of being
I’m doing the little I can

But somedays I see

How many want this life to persist

Or think that there is no other way 

Than to live with these constructs

That make so many suffer
She share morning saved me by sharing her stories to me as reminders (One story to share): She said she asked her own Elder in a moment of heartbreak by the world around her- “Apo-Why do we work so hard?

Why are we so poor?

He answered

“This Earth is big

and everyone was assigned to a certain place

And everyone has to take care of that place.
Even the birds

They can only live with certain trees

(The Creator) made them for the certain trees

We all have the same place

He made our skin

Our eyes

Our body

To protect our part of this Earth 

But the problem is that we are stealing from each other

We are small beings and we have to take care 

Of what is ours to take care of. 

You are blessed for every seed we plant.

When you care for a seed, 

you already care for so much.
Think of the corn with one seed

You have two stalks and each stalks bears 100 seeds
Too many people don’t see their blessings

Too many don’t know how abundant

with one corn seed you have 200 stalks of corn, 

and you are still not satisfied?” We have to celebrate

We celebrate when we plant

We celebrate when we harvest

We celebrate life.
She said-

“Without people like us

They will forget

It’s good we’re here

Because it can be passed down to our children.

And so you are doing good work, because 

You teach.

You teach them to take care of our world after us.” ———– I know its not going to be immediate

I know its going to be difficult

To live in this Now

That makes my heart break

Every

Day.

But I am here 

I will play my part

I will protect what I can

I will follow my purpose in my belonging 

And I will urge others to understand their belonging too

And celebrate it in deep prayer.

I have daydreams of letting go of all things, of this life. And I feel so crazy, I feel like my loved ones think I am crazy. I lose my friends, I lose companions and students because I believe what I do about this world not serving us- too deeply sometimes. I’m not trying to shame anyone in speaking my beliefs, or making them feel guilty, I want just to contribute my perspective to the ability to make change for the betterment of us all.
I know I cannot change these structures 

But can contribute to the changes necessary for our survival
I give thankful for those who continue to accept me and to support me and to love me, for who I am, for my beliefs and for my work.
Eating apples on a Monday Afternoon, exchanging in understandings of the world.
More comfort from my Elder. More love of lessons. More pray. 
She said:
“Many are worried about me

Because I have very little already

That I gave up so much

I sacrificed

Until I am in my bare minumum

And my community they worry for me

But I’m not worried

I believe I lived a good life
For the people

For the youth

I have been educating-

They are now at their right age 

And they are now the ones

You are doing the good work

In their communities
Whatever man has done to the Earth 

Will be paid back by man

We can’t help how people have destroyed the Earth 

We are passing anyway

The destiny of this Earth will be to pass

But we need to do our part as we are alive

To sustain
We have to be gentle to ourselves

We can only do what we can

We can only do so much

And we have to do it where we can be supported

To do that good work more

Accept that you cannot change

That you can only contribute to the change
Keep humble to your gifts

And keep speaking the way you do Jana 

You’re so young, but you’re so wise
You understand

Keep speaking your beliefs.

Your beliefs need to be heard 

To challenge the beliefs that many think they cannot change

That are the beliefs of those that do not care for the people

They do not care about the land

They do not care about the water.
This is a time of confusion.

Human beings are confused

By all the luxury

By the want for things that are rooted in vanity.

How will you make your life 

More useful to Many People.

You will.

Just share your belief.

Just share your prayer.”

I’m learning. Ever learning are all of us. And the deeper I learn with my spirit leading me, the more I am opened to all there is in life that is miracle and blessing in every moment. I am grateful for my sisters Jen and Aimee in Toronto who hold space for me, who support my rising, who see me, and accept me wholly as I am. I am humbled to hold space for them and lift them with my love and admiration in return. Many lessons to learn in future days together, I feel it, I know it and I am ever filled with gratitude.